4 things to keep in mind before you say I do
2019-02-12

Taking your relationship to the next step is a huge decision to make. While marriage may seem like a natural progression, especially if you have been together long enough, it shouldn’t be a move you make simply because it’s the next step.

Instead, take the time to discuss your thoughts and feelings on marriage with each other or an expert to conclude if you are truly prepared to move ahead together. Here are four things to keep in mind before you say “ I do” or “Yes” to the life-changing questions.

Accepting and Adapting

Each of you is unique and your differences are meant to complement each other and your relationship. Since you have made it to the point where marriage is in the picture, these individual differences have already been accepted and loved.

However, once in marriage, you’ll also have to accept that both of you will continue to change and more differences may surface. If this occurs, you need to be prepared to adapt to these changes and continue to accept one another for who they are and who they grow to be. Learning above and understanding someone is a lifelong process and this applies to your partner as well.

Security

Every relationship, especially your marriage should have a firm sense of security. When your relationship transitions into marriage, this sense of security should be brought forth as well.

Apart from emotional security--essential for every relationship--both of you need to examine your financial security as well. Going into marriage with a secure financial base is necessary and not something that should be disregarded. Starting off your married life with a secure monetary base plays a major role in easing the transition for both of you as well.

Trust

No relationship would have made it this far without trust. Trust is one of the pillars of any relationship, especially marriage. As you’re essentially promising yourself to the other, you need to be able to trust them with your life.

It is not merely about believing that your partner will always love you, it is being able to trust that they will continue to commit to the marriage and that they will strive to communicate. These are the essentials of a successful marriage. You need to be confident in these areas before moving the relationship forward.

Pre-wedding Counselling

Pre-wedding counselling should be an option regardless of the state of your relationship. Pre-wedding counselling reaps numerous benefits such as improving communication skills, providing an opportunity to address and approach your problems and act as a platform for both of you to learn and discover new aspects of each other.

Pre-wedding counselling is also a great way to strengthen the relationship that you already have and allow you to enter marriage with a better grasp the relationship you share and will continue to share.

REACH Counselling Service aims to build enduring marriages through marital counselling and marital work, including Marriage Preparation Programmes. For more information, contact REACH Counselling Service at 6801 0730 or at [email protected].