Si Dian Jin Etiquette: Dos And Don’ts For The Bride’s Parents
2025-08-29

Si Dian Jin is a beloved tradition in Chinese culture, especially in Singapore, where heritage and modernity blend seamlessly in wedding celebrations. For many Chinese families, this jewellery set represents more than just gold – it’s a symbol of blessings, acceptance, and future prosperity. Rooted in Teochew customs but now embraced by many, it holds a special place in the marriage journey.

As with any tradition that carries deep meaning, etiquette is key. Whether you’re familiar with the custom or learning about it for the first time, understanding the dos and don’ts can help avoid awkward misunderstandings and preserve the respectful tone the ceremony deserves. Here’s a practical guide for the bride’s parents navigating Si Dian Jin in Singapore today.

The Do’s and Dont’s

● DO: Accept with Gratitude and Grace

Whether it’s a traditional yellow gold set or a modern white gold version, always receive the Si Dian Jin with appreciation. It’s a heartfelt gesture from the groom’s family, often selected with care. Even if the design isn’t something the bride would typically wear, graciousness is key. If preferences were previously discussed, respect that effort.

Also, if you're invited to witness the exchange, express your thanks sincerely, as it goes a long way in setting the tone for harmonious relations between both families.

● DON’T: Criticise the Jewellery Set

Avoid commenting negatively on the size, weight, or style of the jewellery. While some families may prefer chunkier pieces to show abundance, others might opt for sleeker, modern designs. Whatever the case, this is not the time to compare value or make remarks about cost.

If the bride prefers not to wear certain pieces, that conversation is better had in private after the ceremony. The day itself is about symbolism and respect, not personal taste.

● DO: Understand Its Symbolism Before the Big Day

Si Dian Jin is a key part of Chinese weddings, and it’s helpful for the bride’s parents to understand why. Having this context adds meaning to the moment and helps you support your daughter as she participates in a ceremony that represents being welcomed into a new family.

For those unfamiliar, Si Dian Jin is not a dowry. It’s a gesture from the groom’s side, and there’s no expectation for the bride’s family to match it. That said, some parents choose to gift their daughter jewellery or an heirloom of their own, but this is entirely optional.

● DON’T: Re-Gift or Reuse the Set

If you’re thinking of using Si Dian Jin from a previous generation, always check with the groom’s family first. While some might see it as honouring heritage, others may prefer to give a new set to mark a fresh chapter. Never assume it’s okay to replace or supplement the set without clear communication.

Likewise, if the jewellery is gifted, it should be kept by the bride. It’s poor form to suggest that the pieces be exchanged, sold, or returned unless agreed upon from the start.

● DO: Align on Attire and Occasion Details

The presentation of Si Dian Jin is often photographed, so it’s a good idea to coordinate outfits for that moment. Some brides wear a traditional kua, while others opt for a modern cheongsam or a pastel-coloured dress. In recent years, there’s also been a trend of pairing this with evening gown rental in Singapore for brides who want a more elegant or romantic look during the exchange or tea ceremony.

For the bride’s parents, keeping attire semi-formal or traditional adds a respectful touch and helps maintain the overall tone of the ceremony.

● DON’T: Feel Pressured to Follow Every Rule

Weddings evolve, and so do traditions. If your family doesn’t have a history of giving or receiving Si Dian Jin, that’s okay too. The most important thing is to communicate early and openly with the groom’s family about expectations.

There’s no need to follow customs blindly; many modern couples customise the experience. What matters most is that both families are comfortable and feel respected.

Creating a Meaningful and Respectful Moment

Ultimately, Si Dian Jin is about blessing a union and building bridges between families. It’s not about gold weight, brand names, or who spent what. For the bride’s parents, participating with sincerity, humility, and understanding can help make this tradition meaningful not just for the couple but for the family legacy they’re beginning together.

Want to take the stress out of wedding planning? Blissful Brides connects you with trusted vendors for everything from Si Dian Jin to evening gown rental in Singapore.

Get a quote today and let your daughter’s big day be as beautiful as the love it celebrates.