5 tips to coping in a long distance marriage
2019-02-16

Vendor: REACH Counselling  

5 tips to coping in a long distance marriage

In this day and age with technological advancements and ease of travelling, the world is much more interconnected than ever and in its own way, smaller than it seems. These advances don’t just improve life, but they also play a part in maintaining relationships, especially long-distance relationships.

Long-distances relationships (LDR) isn’t something every couple will go through, but those who have experienced this separation can vouch for it to be some of the most testing times of a relationship (but not all).

If you’re currently in an LDR or will be going through one in the near future, here are five tips to help you cope with the distance whilst maintaining your marriage.

Communication is vital 

Whether you are in the same house or countries apart, communication should always be the top priority between you and your spouse. Not only will this help you to stay in constant contact with each other, but it also helps both of you to remain a part of each other’s lives.

Apart from simply holding verbal communications, have Skype sessions, short video calls throughout the day or send each other images, videos or voice notes. These mementoes will play a huge part in helping your partner brave the distance.

Make time for each other

Regardless of where you are, making time for each other is another crucial factor. This doesn’t only refer to the regular calls and Skype sessions, but it also refers to making time to write your partner a letter, play games together online or choosing to set aside some time when the other calls you with a problem. Making time for each other acts as a form of assurance to both parties that they are still a priority

Meet up


5 tips to coping in a long distance marriage

Whenever possible, meet up with your partner. Take turns to visit each other and spend quality time together. Couples can opt to see their meet-ups as a sort of milestone or goal. For example, if your next meet up is 3 months away, you can use this as a source of motivation and encouragement to get through the 3 months. It gives you something to look forward to.

Surprise each other

The distance should not stop you from surprising and/or showing your partner how much you love them. The best surprises are always the ones that are, undoubtedly, the most unexpected ones.

Putting in the extra effort to surprise your significant other with little gifts they do not expect from you helps to keep the romance alive, and serves as much needed motivation to pull though the tougher periods of the LDR together. For example, have flowers delivered to your wife once in a while if you are not the sort to get her flowers. Wife could send a care package to your husband too.

Help each other through 

It takes two hands to clap, more so in a marriage. While distance remains an obstacle, cope by helping each other. Try not to conceal feelings or pick avoidable arguments with each other.

Help each other by laying them all on the table, from expectations while you are apart to expectations when you get together and come to a reasonable compromise. This gives both of you an idea of what you can expect and not have feelings hurt when the other doesn’t act a certain way.

Another way to help each other is by leaving behind a scented shirt or pillowcase. This can go a long way in helping your partner feel at ease or comforted with something physical.

REACH Counselling Service aims to build enduring marriages through marital counselling and marital work, including Marriage Preparation Programmes. For more information, contact REACH Counselling Service at 6801 0730 or at counselling@reach.org.sg.

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